OUCH!

 

I think something just hit me in the face!! Oh wait… no, no… It was just life…

I don’t really feel like blogging about everything tonight. I feel like I have already blog-blabbed enough to almost ruin things… Things are definitely moving forward with the Army and the wedding. Looks like both are happening.

Don’t get my wrong. I am EXCITED!!! But between a new high-stress job that has become full-time, trying to join the Army without getting disqualified for medical fraud and planning a wedding, things are getting HECTIC!! They are all things I want. Things I have always wanted, actually. I am so excited I think I am stressing myself out more. I am a person who feeds off of stress. Someone who needs stress to keep motivation. Well, here it is… a nice steaming platter of stress. I’m not going to lie. I enjoy it. Tasty.

So, the date is almost set. The budget is becoming more of a sad reality and less of a fantasy and there seems like every second I eliminate a costly factor another 10 factors weasel their way in.

We have a location, which is great! I am excited about it. I think we are going to end up having to conduct the ceremony inside, which is not really what I had ever had in mind, but due to budget restraints and a desolate location, indoors is best.

I have so many ideas that are flowing, but I’d hate to spoil the surprise for everyone. Oh, come on? Tell you? Well… okay!

No. I don’t want to speak to soon and I don’t want to ruin such a big, beautiful experience for all my lovely, honored guests!

Cole and I had a discussion today about registering at maybe one store. He first had to ask what a registry was and once I explained he got to run around the store with a scan gun the look on his face at least seemed like he was increasingly interested… We have yet to register and still aren’t sure whether we will. Cole leaves May 25th and I will most likely leave shortly after. Neither of us will be done with school until December where we will then move onto post and have most everything provided. So, what is there to register for? I have no clue.

I have been looking around at honeymoon locations and discovered out of the country is not an option. I don’t have a passport. And since the wedding is so close there is no way I could obtain one. So, next option? Yosemite!!! Oh wait.. they book a year in advance. Hmm… maybe Monterey?? Oh! I possibility! There are plenty of things to do in Monterey! So, that is my tentative plan, but I am sure something will come up and we will be back where we started.

I do need to get something clear. VERY clear. There have been rumors spreading around that the only reason I am joining the Army and getting married is because I am jealous of my sister, Ashley and the fact she just had her baby. First of all, for those who know me well, know that I have always thought of the military as being my first choice for a career. I have always dreamed of making a difference in the world we live in and couldn’t think of a better way than to serve in the U.S Armed Forces.

Second, I love Cole. Anyone who has seen us together can understand that. We are inseparable, indescribable, best friends, lovers and sole mates. We are not together to make heads turn, we aren’t together to prove something, we are together for the same reason that you and your spouse are today, love. Love, trust, loyalty, faithfulness, caring, understanding and Cole really is the best friend I have ever had.

Third, I feel no reason to be jealous of my sister. I love her daughter with all my heart, but I know how hard it is for Ashley to balance life between her own parents, grandparents, Andrew, friends and keeping herself sane. I love Ashley and that’s why I am not jealous of her. I am happy for her.

So, if you want, feel free to call me jealous and immature, but I am trying to start a life for myself and Cole that many do not have the opportunity to do. I want to do things right, as he does and we want to honor those who have helped us a long the way.

OH GOODNESS! This has become WAY longer and in depth than I ever imagined. I am tired and speaking from the sleepy part of my heart. I don’t mean to sound ungrateful, demanding or rude, but I am sure as any bride can understand, life it getting CRAZY.